The X-Men work on once again fixing up the mansion,
combing through the rubble left after their battle with the Hellfire Club. In
the medical bay, Storm is attended to by Carol Danvers, recently depowered and
seeing Xavier for help. Nightcrawler teleports in after a sweep of the grounds
to report that the Danger Room, the prime computer, and one wing of the house
are completely destroyed, and Professor X admits that they don’t really have
the funds or manpower to properly rebuild them. Just then, Kitty Pryde alerts
Colossus that it’s his sister Illyana’s bedtime and Illyana asks Kitty to tell
her a story. Kitty begins her tale, about the daring Pirate Kitty and her
companion Colossus, who rob from the rich and give to the poor, champions of
the oppressed! After the two execute another daring escape from those intent on
capturing them, they come upon a wise Wizard and the Prince of a foreign land
and save them from a gang of ruffians. They tell of how the Wizard’s
apprentice, and princess of the land, Princess Jean, was overtaken by a
powerful force, becoming the Dark Phoenix!
Just then, Dark Phoenix arrives to wreak havoc on the
land, but the Wizard is able to drive her away with a crystal ball containing
the last of Jean’s soul. Pirate Kitty then gestures out to the sea, intent to
get transport, but nothing happens. After a couple humorous moments, Kitty
whistles and her giant dragon Lockheed comes up from the water and Kitty tries
to convince him to help them catch Dark Phoenix. Meanwhile, in the real world,
Wolverine comes upon Nightcrawler eavesdropping on the tale, and Kurt convinces
him to stay and listen to the exciting story as well! With all now aboard
Lockheed, they make their way in search of Dark Phoenix, until Lockheed is
forced to stop to relax and refuel on a small island. The others go off to
investigate the island, leaving Pirate Kitty to be accosted by a small, blue
creature called a Bamf! The Bamf declares his love for Kitty before teleporting
away. The real Kurt is none too pleased with his depiction in Kitty’s story,
though Logan gets a good laugh, and he invites Storm and Carol to come join in
the fun as well.
The Bamf returns with others of his kind all clamoring
for Kitty’s attention until the initial Bamf chases all of the others away.
Elsewhere on the island, Colossus comes upon a bottle on the edge of the sea.
He opens it, freeing a genie called Wind-Rider, who tells him of being trapped
there by Dark Phoenix. The group is all reunited and soon encounter another
creature burrowing out of the ground, the Fiend-With-No-Name! Everyone has a
laugh at Wolverine’s depiction, himself included, and Cyclops and Professor
Xavier join in listening as well. The Fiend-With-No-Name accuses the Prince of
stealing Jean from him and after a bit of intimidation from Colossus and
Lockheed, he’s convinced to come on their journey as well. They fly along until
the sun suddenly lights up, heralding the arrival of Dark Phoenix once more!
The Wizard and the Genie do their best to combat Dark
Phoenix with their own magic. Pirate Kitty tries to convince Lockheed to blast
Dark Phoenix with his fire breath, but he remains uncooperative. The Fiend
gives the dragon a little poke, causing flame to shoot from his mouth in
surprise, but also causing him to buck off all of his riders! Wind-Rider saves
the others, using her magic to give each of them wings of various styles.
Pirate Kitty is not happy with the wings she receives. They all gang up on Dark
Phoenix, allowing the Wizard the opportunity to use his crystal ball, reuniting
Jean’s soul with her body, and casting the benevolent Phoenix Force back into
space! Freeing Jean also lifted the Prince’s curse on his eyes, allowing the
two to marry and live happily ever after! Kitty finishes her story, with
Illyana fast asleep and exits to find that everyone had been listening the
whole time! Though initially embarrassed, they tell her they loved it,
particularly Scott, who thanks her for the happy ending, content that these
versions of him and Jean got to live happily ever after.