And so the New Twelve
Labors of Hercules begin, a TV show hosted by Eurystheus and Achelous:
1.
Hercules is sent to the
Savage Land to capture a sabretooth tiger. On arrival he mistakes an allosaurus
for his quarry, subduing it quickly. After Gordon, Robert, and Jimmy explain
that the new labors parallel the old labors thus a tiger is similar to the lion
he fought once, Herc rushes off into the jungle and returns with a hogtied
Zabu. After he departs, Ka-Zar and Shanna arrive in a very bad mood looking for
Hercules….
2.
To parallel the slaying
of the Hydra, Herc is now pitted against the modern terrorist organization
which has a huge multi-headed monster of their own. While Herc is busy with it,
Hydra Commander #56 pitches a reality series of his own to Gordon at gunpoint,
involving Hydra interns being set to various evil tasks and facing death if
they fail. Herc comes out and faints, the monster having exploded before he
could fight it. The commander blames the R&D department and leaves….
3.
Herc and company fly to
the Blue Area of the moon to capture the Inhumans’ dog Lockjaw. They make it
safely away then discover from Herc that the giant doggie has swallowed Jimmy….
4.
Herc next must capture
Dragon Man so he chains himself to the beast which flies off with him.
Eventually it tires and goes to sleep in a dumpster, allowing Herc to complete
the labor….
5.
Hercules drives off
Attuma and his army from attacking Atlantis, so the conqueror sets his sights
on a retirement home on the Florida Coast….
6.
For a modern equivalent
of cleaning out the Augean stables with their wretched odor, Hercules must stay
in a room with the Red Skull’s dust of death. He does and comes out laughing a
bit too much….
Hercules takes a break
from the labors, brooding on a sidewalk. Jimmy offers him a bit of wisdom from
his father that it’s better to be lucky than be good. And he advises Herc, “Now
that you’ve been lucky, go be good.” And Herc perks up.
7.
Hercules is set to face
the Abomination at Madison Square Garden. On their way in Gordon interviews
Blonsky and while the big scaly guy is bragging about how he is going to defeat
Hercules, the Prince of Power bashes him with a streetlamp, ending the match….
Gordon, Robert, and
Jimmy are delighted as Herc has turned a corner, recovering his heroic
qualities. But elsewhere, Eurystheus and Achelous are concerned that the series
is not turning out the way they had hoped. A disappointed Hera appears before
them, handing over her list of the four final tasks….