Synopsis
Dr Henry Pym's not too comfortable with the Prom Night that's been arranged for the Avengers Academy students and guests. He mentions the hard fight they had with Korvac. And after seeing what some versions of their future selves are like, Hazmat and Mettle are struggling with the probability that they'll never be 'cured' and Veil may not be going to an early death but she will become immaterial. Plus Reptil's now stuck in his adult future body. (All this in the last 2 issues.) Tigra tells him that this is the best time to let the students act like normal kids as she fastens a flower to his Giant-Man costume. But in that case why is everyone wearing their super-costumes? Because some of the guests have secret identities. In that case why does *she* get to wear a party dress? Because her bikini isn't her costume, *Tigra* is her (Greer Nelson's) costume. Hank's last question is whether they're on a date? Greer says that they're chaperones for the kids, but yes it's a date but there'll be no kissing.
They enter the room to find the party's already started. Teacher Speedball's the DJ watched by Mettle. Hazmat is dancing with Butterball (of the Initiative) while student Finesse breakdances beside her and Spider-Girl (of the Young Allies) does similar moves balanced by 1 hand on Butterball's head and Batwing (Initiative) hangs from the ceiling to watch. Teacher Justice is drinking punch with his current girlfriend Ultra Girl (of the New Warriors) while ex-girlfriend Firestar (a Young Ally) ignores Gravity (also YA) and watches them with a frown. Behind them dance Hardball and Komodo (an Initiative couple who've split).
Reptilian Komodo makes a play for student Reptil who she assumes is in his 30's as his body suggests. When he explains that he's really only 16 she rapidly backs off. Reptil refuses to use his body-age to buy student Striker a beer so Brandon Sharpe stalks off to chat up YAer Nomad (Rikki Barnes). Student Finesse can't understand why Humberto Lopez keeps the aged body. He claims it's because it enables him to become *large* dinosaurs, but Jeanne Foucault counters that it's because it's been treated with Pym Particles, and Dr Pym could do that for his teen body now that he's seen that it's safe. She figures that he has a more psychological reason. But he interrupts her by telling her he knows that she's blackmailing Quicksilver into teaching her what he learned from Magneto about being a villain. But then Hardball interrupts *that* by accusing 'Berto of hitting on his girlfriend. Komodo angrily points out she's not his girl anymore, and Reptil says that K made the move. So of course it turns into an energy balls vs dinosaur face-off ...
... but Pym turns Giant-Man to split them up. Tigra comments to Hank how awkward he seems, not just about dealing with adolescents but about their own relationship. They haven't dated for years (since West Coast Avengers) but they sort-of have a child because she had another relationship with 'him' after he'd been replaced by a Skrull. Greer tells him how Skrull-him was so sympathetic and understanding, and Henry comments that the Skrull was a better him. (In the background Hardball and Komodo argue and then kiss.) Greer responds that the Skrull could never have done something as selfless as founding this Academy. He exploited Hank's talents and she only fell for it because she thought he *was* Hank. Their eyes meet and she whispers that she's going to her room, and he should follow in 5 minutes. But he doesn't wait that long before asking Speedball to look after the party for him. And nobody's fooled.
Robbie Baldwin tells his old New Warriors compatriots Firestar and Justice that it's his irresistible musical selections. Vance Astrovik comments that he believes a child's parents should be married. Angelica Jones 'warns' Ultra Girl about his traditional values but Suzy Sherman is too wowed by 'big star' Firestar and how cool it is that she's so nice to someone who's sleeping with her ex-fiancee. Angel finally loses it because Vance always told her he wanted to save sex until their wedding night because she was special. She punches him into the punch bowl and then stalk off. Justice follows her protesting that they were at war (when he 1st slept with Suzy). Suzy follows demanding to know why *she* wasn't special. Gravity asks Speedball if they should intervene but Robbie wants to keep out of it.
Butterball is now dancing with Nomad, and Veil mentions to Hazmat that he's indestructible. Jennifer Takeda thinks Maddy Berry is suggesting she should have sex with him purely because her toxicity/radiation won't harm him. She counters that Veil should be grabbing every decent-looking guy she can before she goes insubstantial. But the only guys *she* can touch are ugly. At which point Mettle hands her the punch he's just brought and leaves the room. She follows Ken Mack to apologise, but he says she's right about his skull face and metallic red skin. She says she used to be freaked by his appearance but since they've started hanging out she's stopped noticing. That comment was aimed at fat Butterball. They sort-of agree that he doesn't like her *that* way, but she says his body is pretty hot. He disarms the compliment by joking that it means he should wear a bag over his head. And the Hawaiian ex-surfer says that in surfer parlance she's a Betty, ie cute. Jen wonders if the others are right that they should get together because they can't kill each other. It's left hanging.
Finesse is watching Spider-Girl leap up to balance 1-handed on a basketball hoop. She comments to Reptil that his girlfriend is impressive. He replies that she's not his girlfriend. They hit it off (in the Avengers Academy Giant-Size 1-shot) but she's been avoiding him today. But he also accuses her of changing the subject (from several paragraphs ago), and as leader of the students he 'orders' her to stop taking lessons from Quicksilver. The girl with photographic reflexes leaps up to copy SG's move while claiming that Pietro Maximoff is teaching a lot of stuff that the regular lessons avoid but that she might need to survive. It's not about being a villain rather than a hero, but she finds the distinction blurry anyway. Spider-Girl finally confronts Reptil to ask about his 'mid-life crisis'.
But we turn to where Justice has caught up with Firestar to expand on what he said. He and Suzi (and others) were being hunted by Norman Osborn (during his Dark Reign) and it felt like they could die at any moment, and the sex just happened. Angelica comments that *they* were often in danger, but Vance says that in their case he always felt they had the rest of their lives together ... until their relationship ended. Angel pauses and then admits that she misses that certainty too. But she doesn't want them to hate each other so they call a truce. Gravity and Ultra Girl find them and Angel gets ready to apologise to Suzy. Vance comments that Gravity seems nice but Angel says she's not ready for a relationship just now, after she's finally beaten cancer. Vance suggests she could at least dance with G, and he could ask Suzy's permission to dance with Angel. Angel replies it better not be a slow dance because she understands Suzy can bench-press a truck.
Back on the dance-floor Nomad finally gave in and danced with Striker but is now strong-arming him because he grabbed her butt, but he claims his hand just slipped. She delivers him to Veil who chides him for going after girls who aren't interested. He says he likes the challenge, but opines that she's jealous because he didn't actually have sex with her (in #5). Maddy says she's glad they just talked all night, so to keep him from getting beaten up by any other girls *she*'ll dance with him. But no butt-grabbing. Brandon counters she's got nothing to grab.
They see Hazmat and Mettle together and Brandon predicts it won't end well. Maddy asks why he's always so negative. He reminds her that they all nearly died fighting Korvac, and *his* future self *did* get killed. He's not mollified by her reply that it was only 1 *possible* future him. He rants that everyone's trying to mould them into obedient little heroes just to boost their own egos. Then when they get killed by Dr Doom or somebody they'll erect a memorial and forget about them. But then we get to what's really rankling him - how everybody's judging him for running away after Korvac killed his adult self. Maddy assures him that after the fights he fought, including against Korvac, he's got nothing to prove to anyone. They can talk about it if he wants but right now she'd just like to dance with him.
Reptil has shown Spider-Girl how his adult body allows him to become a really big dinosaur (given the constraints of the room), but she still wants to know if he's going to stay an adult because it freaks her out. He tries claiming that it gives him more authority as class leader, but she counters that it just makes him look like a pathetic 30-year old guy who likes hanging around with teens. She says her team (Young Allies) are afraid of getting too close to each other or even admit they're a team in case something happens to 1 of them, but at the same time they cling to each other. (We see Firestar slow-dancing with Gravity.) 'Berto confesses that in his case they claim to be a team but in reality don't like each other. But Anya Corazon points to slow-dancing Striker & Veil and Hazmat & Mettle and says they seem to be getting along OK. And she adds that *she* likes *him* the way he was. So Humberto wills his young body back.
They seem to be moving in for a kiss when angry Hardball jumps in again claiming that Reptil deliberately made himself look old to attract Komodo. Speedball intervenes but HB hits *him* with hard balls of energy. SB responds with a flood of *his* energy balls. Greer Nelson and Hank Pym are in bed together when the Jocasta AI alerts them to the altercation. They rush out to deal with the problem, Pym pulling parts of his Giant-Man costume as he goes. (Tigra's bikini was obviously much easier.) Greer is a bit concerned about Hank's robot ex-girlfriend knowing where they were, but Hank assures her there are no cameras inn the bedrooms, and Jocasta's not jealous. They reach the room and find everyone joyfully bouncing around on the combination of energy balls. Young-again Reptil comes out to greet them but Spider-Girl follows him and starts a food fight with a paper plate-ful of pie, and they dive back in to the melee. The chaperones let them enjoy the fun while it lasts.
CharactersGood (or All)Plus: Batwing (
Jimmy Santini), Butterball (
Emery Schaub), Gravity (
Greg Willis), Hardball (
Roger Brokeridge), Justice (
Vance Astrovik), Komodo (
Melati Kusuma), Nomad (
Rikki Barnes), Toro (
Benito Serrano), Ultragirl (
Suzy Sherman).