Synopsis
The 1st story reprints Avengers #1 - The coming of the Avengers.
2nd story - Some assembly required
Iron Man, in his bulky yellow armour, has convened the 2nd monthly meeting of the Avengers in the Stark family Mansion now Avengers Mansion. (The inaugural meeting is described at the end of the Avengers: The Origin mini-series.) He asks everyone to take their seats. Surly Hulk says he'll sit when he *wants* to. Thor says IM was just being hospitable but he himself is ready to enforce the rules. Wasp flirts with the Thunder God. IM tries to start the meeting but Hulk asks if Thor was *threatening* him. Thor retorts that Hulk didn't have the brains to recognise a threat. Hulk picks up the heavy meeting table to throw at him. Insect-sized Ant-Man and Wasp intervene to calm them both down, Wasp by flirting with them both simultaneously. Thor offers a truce if Hulk puts the table down.
AM&W de-shrink to human-size. Hulk flirts back at Wasp. Ant-Man calls him on what he says and Hulk brazenly admits to a double entendre. AM asks for an apology and Hulk asks him what he's going to do about it "Ruin my Picnic?". Iron Man tries again to call the meeting to order but Wasp is too busy asking Ant-Man (they like the others are keeping their identities secret) if he's jealous, and suggests maybe he should asks her on a date. Hulk butts in to say "I you don't, I will". IM again bangs his gavel. Thor demands that the warriors respect the secretary and smashes the table with Mjolnir. Iron Man mutters about the cost of the purpose-built hi-tech object. Thor apologises but IM says his 'boss' Tony Stark will pay for it (that secret id stuff again).
But now he points out he's *not* the secretary of the meeting he's the chairman. The other males contest his claim to the role. Ant-Man points out that he's got 9 graduate degrees. Thor says being Prince of Asgard makes him the natural leader. Hulk just says he's Hulk, and Iron Man's only Tony Stark's bodyguard. IM says he'll beat him up, and Hulk tells Thor *that's* how to threaten someone. Henry Pym complains to Janet Van Dyne that he could just *invent* something to make him as powerful as any of them (and before next issue he'll have turned himself into Giant-Man). Hulk tries to attack IM who holds him at bay with his repulsor rays.
Thor breaks the fight up and suggests a contest of power, and they end up arm-wrestling. The place is a wreck so they hastily assemble some ordinary tables and chairs for the contests. Hulk easily beats human-size Ant-Man, but Iron Man and Thor are equally matched and there isn't time to wait to see if IM's batteries run out before the Thunder God gets tired. Hulk claims victory but Wasp has a suggestion, and Ant-Man condescendingly suggests they listen because she sometimes has good ideas, She points out that none of the men want to take orders from any of the others so why not make *her* air-quotes chairman. She's just a girl so it won't really count. They agree as long she doesn't tell anyone. So she takes the gavel and taps it on an ordinary table while 'secretary' Iron Man reads the minutes of the previous meeting.
3rd story - The real origin of the Avengers
Script Stan Lee. Pencils/inks Kevin Maguire. Colours Chris Sotomayor. Letters Rus Wooton.
Stan Lee tells us how the Avengers *really* became a team.
He goes to congratulate them on their victory over Loki. The males each claim that *they* were the 1 who won the day. Stan points out that they were just following *his* script but Wasp claims it was Jack Kirby's drawings that made it work. However she and Ant-Man claim that they're drawn too small to be noticed. Hulk says Lee only shows up *after* the fighting. Stan says he didn't want to steal their thunder, which annoys Thor until Iron Man tells him it was only a figure of speech. IM takes his helmet off to polish it (because Stan and the others *really* know that he's Tony Stark).
Stan says he's got a great idea but the others aren't impressed. They don't like how he made it seem that it needed all 5 of them to defeat Loki. Thor complains that he was given fewer lines than his brother Loki. Hulk complains that he's not got a costume other than purple underpants. Stark asks Stan to hurry up and tell them his idea because he's got a hot date, but also grumbles about having to walk around in this heavy, sweaty iron overcoat. Jan's in a hurry too because of a manicure appointment.
Stan says this idea will affect her whole career. She assumes he'll use his Hollywood contacts to put her in a movie. Or even make her the star. Stan says it's better than that, and will affect them all. Hulk says Stan will have to talk to his agent, which he doesn't have. Tony thinks his looks make *him* the shoo-in for the star. Jan goes diva and starts listing her demands. Thor wants *his* name above the title of the film.
Stan deflates them all by telling his idea has nothing to do with films. He wants to turn them into a permanent super-team. Hulk says he doesn't *like* football. Ant-Man worries about getting accidentally stepped on. Thor says a god doesn't team-up with mortals. Stark says he's too rich and powerful to need teammates. Jan's off to the beauty parlour. Stan promises to write all the stories for them, which again doesn't impress. Hulk complains that Stan always makes him sound stupid until Lee points out that he *is*. He promises to make them as famous as the Howling Commandos, and dismisses Stark's comment that the Howlers aren't superheroes. Thor accuses him of taking a bribe from Nick Fury for that plug. Stan throws away the souvenir grenade that Nick gave him, which explodes. Wasp is *definitely* leaving now until Stan says she'll meet dreamy Captain America. Now she's all for the idea, but Hank Pym fumes. And it doesn't sway the other males.
Then Stan does the only thing which makes them all sign the team contract. He offers them royalties on every issue sold (and this sways Tony Stark?!). Wasp, Ant-Man and Hulk hold out for money from toys, games and cartoons. Hank says he'll be able to afford a saddle for the winged ant he rides. Thor will spend it on a haircut. Then Stan suggests the name 'The Avengers' and nobody can be bothered to argue.
Now Stan tells us that's what *really* happened. He promises sometime to tell us how he persuaded Loki to join the X-Men.