Synopsis / Summary / Plot
A man named Jeremy Ellsden finishes recording a message and saves stuff on a USB stick. He packs his laptop in his shoulder bag, leaves his cat Pickles with his neighbour Mrs Horovitz and flees his apartment building as we see someone breaking into it.
It's Halloween and in another apartment block we see kids trick or treating at the door of a man they suspect is Hawkeye of the Avengers and who is renowned for the full-size candy bars he hands out as treats at this time. But Clint Barton disguised as Ultron this year only has disappointing fun-size bars.
Neighbour Simone and her 2 kids are there with her friend Emily Preston and *her* 2 kids Terry and Eleanor plus Emily's friend Wade. Deaf Clint converses with them using lip-reading because he isn't wearing his hearing aid (because of the Ultron costume), but he can't understand Terry because of *his* full-face Hulk mask. He recognises Wade as Wade Wilson/Deadpool who's allowed to show his scarred face tonight because people will just assume it's a Halloween disguise. Emily reveals she's learned lots of languages since transferring to a robot body including sign language so she and Clint have a chat that way where she explains that she got killed but Wade transferred her mind into a SHIELD LMD (the short version of a long story in the Deadpool (2013) series). Clint and Wade clash horns over the size of the candy bars but DP says he's only joking. They all leave.
The next knock on his door is Ellsden who wants to give him evidence about some mob stuff he's got involved in but Clint brushes him off with some candy bars. Ellsden goes out into the rain and passes Simone's gang heading home. He too recognises Deadpool and slips the USB stick into his candy bag with some coconut candy bars. Ellsden is being followed by a man dressed as Punisher with an added skull mask. Wade apologises in advance to the kids for the coconut bars as they reach Clint's door. They hear shots outside and Hawkeye rushes out. Emily sends Deadpool to help. He's wearing his costume under his Ghostbusters costume.
Outside he finds that Hawkeye has pinned the Punisher to a van with arrows and is pronouncing Ellsden dead. DP observes that Punisher is a fake because the real 1's not that bulky. He admits to knowing this because he and Frank Castle have just been in a secret team together (in the 2013 Thunderbolts series). Wade tries to unmask 'Punisher' but the villain says "I am a patriot" and bites his fingers. Clint tells him to stop 'helping' and go away just before an even-bulkier 'Daredevil' spouting more patriotic stuff hits him from behind and takes Ellsden's bag with the laptop.
Punisher breaks free and attacks Deadpool. Hawkeye recovers and slams P's head in the van door but the bad guy manages to taser DP. P gets a lucky blow to Clint's ear causing his hearing aid to emit a piercing sound and then fail(?). DP attacks P but H realises he's pulled a pin from a grenade on P's chest. He warns DP but it turns out to be only a smoke grenade. Still chanting patriotically P shoots at H but DP takes the bullets for him.
The villain runs off and Wade urges Clint to go after him. However a bullet damaged Hawkeye's bow and he reckons it's only good for 1 more shot. After a long chase where he's watching for his chance Hawkeye takes his long shot. The bow breaks but the arrow pierces the bad guy's leg. Cops confront the fake Punisher but he asserts his patriotism again and walks in front of an oncoming truck.
Clint returns to Wade who tells him about the fake Daredevil who took Ellsden's bag. Wade grabs 4 hot dogs to help his body repair the bullet wounds and then they go meet police detectives outside Clint's brownstone (which he still owns from his last series). Clint's dog Lucky is also there. The cops reveal that the dead victim was Jeremy Ellsden and DP hands over 1 of Punisher's bullets he's just spat out. Then Hawkeye relates what happened in a soundless montage deliberately echoing those that several times cropped up in the previous series, while Deadpool fumes because it's taking so long.
Afterwards the duo are in Clint's apartment when Wade finds the USB stick in his goodie bag. It's a message from Ellsden saying that he's stolen all the personnel files for active SHIELD Agents. He did it because he doesn't trust the government but now he's realised that handing it over to villains will put all those Agents' lives at risk. Clint doesn't want Wade to hear any more for security reasons but Wade says that Emily and Ellie are in danger and tries to KO Clint and take the USB drive. But it doesn't work so Barton counterattacks.
Meanwhile 'Daredevil' has delivered Ellsden's laptop to a Dr Lusk who reports back to their boss Black Cat that the computer doesn't contain the data they want. She reminds him that the 'drone' was supposed to capture the hacker not kill him. Lusk counters that their mind control program is in its early days.